Finding Your New Way
Sometimes, we find ourselves in places we don’t expect or don’t really want to be. Today, I’m going to share how we sometimes go where we don’t expect to, and why.
Following Maps
A couple years ago, I moved to a new city (Minneapolis). In comparison to my previous home (Los Angeles) it’s not a large city, but since I am still learning the area, when I drive, I will sometimes still use the trusty phone map/directions.
When I wanted to go someplace a bit further away, or that I hadn’t been to before, I would plug in the destination and the maps would lay out the route; but often, the route was complex. With major construction on several key interchanges, I assumed the maps were still correctly showing the ‘fastest’ way to get where I wanted to be. This went on for several months, but it grew frustrating to be taking such long, complicated ways, when I knew there were more direct choices possible.
Over time, I grew suspicious, and checked Google settings (it was fine – shortest, fastest). But one day, riding with a friend, the phone again gave me a bizarre route. This time, since I wasn’t driving, I had the opportunity to dig a bit deeper. There, buried about three sub-menus down, was a setting that said, “Avoid freeways”. Now, I do not ever recall setting that, but there it was, and thus, the phone faithfully was routing me all around the city in an effort to follow ‘my’ setting and help me avoid freeways.
Our Navigation Settings
More times than I care to recount, this experience reminded me of how I’ve ended up taking difficult routes to get where I wanted to go, or ended up in situations or places I didn’t want to be, and wondering why it was so hard, or how I got there when I followed ‘directions’ as I thought I should.
Buried in all of us are the rules we have set for ourselves that tell us how we are going to respond, or what to expect when we get there. Things like “I can’t save money” or “getting a new job is hard” or “I can’t be happy until…” are easy, and obvious, ones. But there are others that are more complex, and deeper. As an example, I grew up with the understanding that folks with lots of money were snobbish. I certainly didn’t want to be snobbish, buried a few sub-menus down was a belief (setting) that if I had lots of money, I’d end up being snobbish – so a built-in resistance to having lots of money hung on me for a long time.
Changing our Settings
Please know, I’m not recommending years of therapy here. Looking at what happens, and asking questions of yourself can reveal a great deal. And for the obvious things you find, remember, it’s now a habit/belief. It will take work and focus to change, but it can be done – the easiest way is to replace it with a new, more affirming habit/belief.
For more on how to change your settings, read “One Percent Future” (https://truthweaver.com/one-percent-future/) or schedule time with me, and we can explore what settings you may have that you don’t realize, and help you update them.
Love, and until next time
